Day 13 Circle A Ranch Chicken Breast Strips

I've never heard of the Circle A Ranch before. In an effort to understand these chicken strips, I Googled "Circle A Ranch" and there are actually a few of them: an Angus beef ranch in Missouri, a hemp products company in Colorado, a guest ranch in New Mexico, and a summer camp in Colorado, none of which appear to have any connection to these breaded strip shaped chicken breast patties with rib meat.   

As with most of the dollar store frozen foods, this is an individual-size portion (two "servings" of 200 calories for a total of 400 in the bag).

The instructions provide for microwave or conventional oven heating but for real restaurant flavor I deep fried mine for four minutes at 350 degrees.

 In the frozen state they look pretty good. The strips smell good. I can pick up notes of garlic and black pepper.

Again you can see the ridiculousness of dividing the bag into "servings". Who is going to eat three and a half chicken strips? Maybe a toddler or something? These are small.

I'm not sure these can really be called strips. They're more like slightly elongated nuggets. They are also all the same shape unlike, say, McNuggets which are cut into four different shapes at the factory.

After the fryer the strips come out golden brown and slightly shrunken. I think they've lost a bit of water weight in the fryer. They feel crispy and still smell good.

 Time to dig in! The breading is crispy and the inside is quite tender, with a lovely white meat chicken flavor and well-spiced breading. What these remind me of actually is Wendy's chicken nuggets. I don't think they're made by the same company (they're certainly not the same shape) but they taste quite similar.

I do wish they came with dipping sauce. These nugget-strips would pair quite nicely with sweet and sour or buffalo sauce.

Day 12 Nissin Teriyaki Beef Flavor Chow Mein

According to Wikipedia, chow mein is a Chinese dish of stir-fried noodles. Teriyaki and Nissin are both Japanese. This is a Japanese take on a Chinese dish made in America. It doesn't get any more international than that!

Did you ever eat chow mein and wonder what the secret to chow mein's delicious flavor was? Well, Nissin Foods (USA) and I are going to let you in on a little secret. The secret is: savory sauce for premium flavor and easy mixing, restaurant quality straight noodles, and premium ingredients.

Tellingly, this secret is only revealed after you remove the shrinkwrap. Only those willing to pay $1 shall be privy to this ancient Chinese (or Japanese?) secret. Cherish the savory sauce and guard it with your life, though, we don't want just anyone knowing the secret of chow mein.








Perhaps the REAL secret to chow mein's delicious flavor is in this really long list of ingredients?

These noodles don't look straight! They look quite curly in fact. Like a bigger version of Ramen. You can also see the vegetables and "beef" bits.

 Maybe the restaurant quality straight noodles straighten after cooking?

 Nope!

 Maybe after we add the secret sauce?


















Still not straight!

It's not bad though. Tastes about like ramen but with less broth. I can't tell if the noodles really are restaurant quality because I've never ordered chow mein at a restaurant.

Day 11 Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup

 The Campbell's soup can has got to be about the most iconic food packaging in America. I think it's really up there with the Coca-Cola bottle. Perhaps because it's changed so little in the past hundred years.

Despite the can being 25% bigger than the regular Campbells condensed soup cans, there's not much here nutritionally. Only 210 calories in the whole can!

Something about this picture, which takes up about a third of the label really bugs me. "In this Campbell's Chicken Noodle soup we begin with good, honest ingredients like lean chicken meat and egg noodles." We see some dry egg noodles in what appears to be a hand-carved wooden bowl. Just like grandma would have back on the farm. The idea being that this soup is hand-crafted from "good, honest ingredients".





The ingredients aren't dishonest, the chicken and egg noodles are definitely real but I don't remember grandma using MSG, soy protein isolate, sodium phosphate, or modified food starch in her chicken soup. I mean come on, Campbells. This is industrially produced, processed canned food. I don't need a homespun "aw shucks" story about how you begin with honest ingredients.

Anyway, enough about the packaging, it's time to make the soup. 

Cooking is easy, just dump it in a pan and add one can of water and bring to a simmer. You can also do it in the microwave, but I opted for stove top because the microwave leads to uneven heating and sometimes splattering of the soup inside the microwave.

I poured all the soup into a big bowl and gave it a minute to cool before digging in.

I ate this soup with no condiments added. Normally I would have added black pepper and Tabasco to the soup but I wanted to experience it in its purest form. The broth is satisfying with a nice substantial mouthfeel, with tons of satisfying umami. The actual chicken flavor is pretty subtle. The noodles were a bit softer than I would have liked but were short and easy to manage with a spoon. The chicken pieces were quite tender and appeared to be dark meat.

When I was a kid my mom told me that the chicken in chicken noodle soup came from hens which had become too old to lay eggs. I think this may have been true in the old days but now I imagine the tough, stringy meat from those hens finds its way into mechanically separated chicken products.

The soup is, by today's standards, quite bland. It's incredibly salty. According to the nutrition facts, I got 111% of my recommended daily value of sodium from the can. There are absolutely no spices that I could discern except the barest hint hint of onion and garlic.

But forget today's standards, what was this soup like in 1934 when it was introduced? I don't think the soup has changed much but I think America has. And not just in the sense that foreign/ethnic food was less prevalent back then but in that expectations for food were lower. My grandfather was born in 1936 and grew up in Colorado in the Great Depression.and through World War 2. He and his siblings had to steal beans from a local farmer's field to feed the family. Lunch was a potato. Not like a baked potato with chives and cheese and bacon bits and chili but a potato and nothing more. Dinner was a slice of bread with some bacon grease.

In this context, a can of Campbell's Chicken Noodle soup would have really really good. Probably a rare treat for the average family back then. It honestly makes me feel quite fortunate that today, my complaints about food are "it's not spicy enough" or "it has soy protein isolate". It could be worse.

Day 10 Snapps Cheese Sticks

 They're called "Snapps" because they can be used as snacks and/or appetizers. But isn't an appetizer just a snack you eat before a meal? Unlike the Michelina's pizza rolls last week, there's no cheese substitute or filler here. This is the real deal, 100% mozzarella cheese filling.

 The package is just right for a single serving but again, too small to share. Also with seven sticks there's no way to divide this evenly (without cutting sticks) among fewer than seven people, because seven is a prime number!

The sticks look good in the frozen state, nice golden brown color. There's no marinara sauce included, and the picture of marinara on the box serves only to taunt you. I would actually give up one stick in the package for a packet of marinara sauce.

 The directions require baking the sticks or deep frying them, specifically warning against microwaving and pan frying. So I heated up the deep fryer to 350 degrees and popped them in for two minutes.

Not bad! One of the sticks has ruptured, leaking a bit of molten hot mozzarella onto the napkin. This happens every time I cook fried mozzarella sticks.

They're actually pretty good! Crispy coating, and chewy mozzarella interior. I didn't have any marinara sauce handy so I added a bit of hot sauce (which is the orange stuff, in case you wondered).

Day 9 Fast Bites Cheeseburger

 What could be more American than a cheeseburger? Especially a cheeseburger in a box, frozen?

 The Fast Bites Cheeseburger (or Cheese-Burger? I'm not sure if the hyphenation on the box means that "cheeseburger" is supposed to be hyphenated or not) comes to us from AdvancePierre® Foods of Cincinnati, Ohio. 

I hadn't heard of AdvancePierre® Foods before so I went into this with no particular expectations. 

 The packaging was a simple cellophane, encompassing the whole burger.

 The cheese featured prominently, it must have been near 1/4" thick!

After microwaving for 1:20 we're ready to dig in! It was much better than I expected. The bun was a bit chewy and the meat patty had a definite char broiled taste with a hunt of soy filler. The cheese tasted about the same as all the other American cheeses I've tasted. The burger is plain, all you get is the meat the cheese and the bun. If you want any condiments you must add them yourself.

This being the case, if you are within range of any fast-food restaurant with a dollar menu burger, you're probably better off with that. You'll get a fresh bun, 100% beef burger, and condiments. The only thing that might change your mind is a fast food burger (at least here in Texas, your sales tax laws may vary) is subject to 8.25% sales tax as a restaurant meal, whereas the AdvancePierre frozen cheeseburger is untaxed as an unprepared food. So you're looking at $1.08 vs $1.00. So that's something to keep in mind.

Sorry for the interruption.

I'm sick with some kind of virus. Dollar Store Dreams should resume on Monday the 12th.

Day 8 Mountain High Premium Coffee

Breakfast wouldn’t be complete – at least not for me – without a hot cup (or three) of coffee.
Where does coffee come from? Most people think about Brazil, Colombia, maybe even Kenya or Hawaii for the really nice stuff. But, behind the scenes Vietnam has been working its way up to #2 producer in the world and is the origin of this bag.

 Coffee used to be sold by the the pound, but in an effort to save money and/or increase profit the “pound” of coffee has worked its way down over the years from 16oz, to 14, to 12, 11, now even 10oz for some brands. 12oz seems to be the most common package size so at $1 for 6oz this is not a bad deal at all, coming in at $2.67 a pound, cheaper than anything in the grocery store.

 I made some in a French press, which is incidentally the best way to make coffee since you have complete control over both brewing time and water temperature (most electric drip coffeemakers don't get the water hot enough for proper extraction of the flavor, due to fear of hot coffee burn lawsuits). Also a French press can be fully disassembled and cleaned after each pot, avoiding any cross-contamination or off flavors.

The coffee was honestly not bad. The cup was pitch-black and full-bodied, with a powerful punch of caffeine. There was not much aroma upon opening the bag, and the cup had a nutty, dark taste. This is definitely not gourmet coffee. There's nothing bad here, but nothing really good here either.

Again though you have to take into account that this is by far the cheapest coffee I've seen. If you judge it by it's price it's actually pretty good.

Day 7 Deluxe Foldable Fan

When I was a kid I was always fascinated with these. I didn't know what the proper name for them was, and I still don't. We called them "Chinese fans" which I guess makes sense because this one is authentically Chinese. Or it's imported from China, anyway.

The front is adorned with beautiful flowers made from embroidery and green sequins, while the bottom half has an embossed oriental motif inlaid with gold-colored paint, along with a gold-colored loop which holds the fan together.

Sadly none of these decorations are carried over to the back side, which is left plain and unadorned. The fabric is attached to the plastic structure with glue which leads me to question the long term durability of the fan, but it should last at least a couple of years. 

 The fan is available in different colors. I chose green because that's my favorite color 

 These photos don't really capture it but in real life the gold inlay and the sequins catch the light and really sparkle. This is nice enough that it could be used as a decoration.

Day 6 Sunbeam Alkaline AA Batteries

Batteries not included. This was at the end of pretty much every toy commercial I saw as a kid. And I always wondered why not. If the toy sells for $29.99 or whatever how much could it cost to throw in a couple of AA batteries? Especially because the toy manufacturer could buy them in bulk and get them for almost nothing.

One semi-convincing explanation I heard is that in the old days, batteries were prone to leaking and the caustic leakage could damage the toy. I don't buy this as an explanation though because these dollar store batteries have a guaranteed shelf life of seven years. It's just one of those unsolvable mysteries like why hot dogs come in packages of ten and buns are sold in packages of eight. But I digress.

Batteries are about the best bargain in the dollar store. All of the alkaline batteries are pretty much the same in my experience so you might as well buy the cheapest. These are destined for a Norelco travel shaver and a pair of Skullcandy Crusher headphones in case you were curious.





 One thing to watch out for though, is that there are two kinds of batteries for sale: these alkaline ones, in packs of four, and "super heavy duty" batteries (the white and red one on the right) in packs of eight. You would think a super heavy duty battery would last longer than a regular alkaline but actually the opposite is true. The "super heavy duty" batteries are based on the older zinc-carbon battery technology and actually contain only about 1/3 as much energy as alkaline batteries.(according to Wikipedia). My recommendation: stick to the alkalines. They cost twice as much per battery but have three times as much electricity inside.

Day 5 Banquet Brown 'N Serve Waffle Breakfast

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and like anything else in life, shouldn’t cost more than a dollar. This was my mindset when I found myself hungry this morning in Dollar Tree.

I had the choice between the pancake and sausage breakfast or the waffle and sausage breakfast. I’ve always been a waffle person so I chose the latter.

This breakfast weighs in at an even 400 calories so if you’re calorie counting and don’t like to cook this is a great way to keep track of calories (and dollars!).

This breakfast proudly proclaims waffles made “from scratch” though I have no idea what this means since anything is “from scratch” if you trace it back far enough.

I was dismayed to find there was no syrup included for the waffles, nor were there any eggs (which I consider a critical breakfast component). I can see why the eggs were omitted for cost reasons but how much would a tablespoon of syrup cost?

The waffles weren’t bad, about like Eggo or any other frozen waffle, excellent taste though rendered slightly gummy by the microwave. If I eat this again, I’ll toast the waffles and microwave the sausage and potatoes.

Moving onto the sausage, a pork-turkey blend. Taste and texture were excellent, with a real country sausage flavor with notes of sage and black pepper. Top-notch stuff.

Turning next to the hash brown discs (or are they tater tots?). When I first examined the meal in the frozen state I initially thought the meal included four but one was stacked on top of another so I actually got five. They taste exactly like you would expect tater tots to taste, wonderful browned potato flavor with a hint of salt.

Overall, it's not bad! I would definitely buy it again and I feel like I got my dollar’s worth. 

Day 4 Authentic Casino Played Cards

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Fortunately these cards didn't stay in Vegas. They have cards from many different casinos for sale but I chose Bally's Las Vegas because I liked the blue color. Casinos have to change cards frequently, both for appearance and to keep unscupulous players from marking the cards for cheating. Casinos change cards every few hours and generate many thousands of decks of discarded cards. Now, if you're like me, you're wondering “how does this work?”

The casinos have to shuffle the cards to use them, but when they're resold they're all put back in order. Is there some kind of machine that uses optical character recognition to sort and package the cards? Humans could certainly do it but it would be really labor intensive and costly. The answer: it's done by prison inmates in Nevada's correctional institutions, for sub-minimum wage. Amazing.

These are Aristocrat™ cards made by the US Playing Card Company, the same company that makes Bicycle™, Hoyle™, Bee™ and other fine brands. At only a dollar these are a great deal, a deck of Bicycle cards (again made by the same company) costs $2 and is of no better quality. Though technically used, these cards look, feel, and even smell brand new.

You don't get joker cards, though, because the casinos don't use those. The cards also have the corners trimmed so they can't be reused in the casino but this doesn't affect playability at all.

For a friendly game of poker or blackjack these can't be beat. If you don't have any friends, you can also use these to play solitaire.